A SHARP LIFE: Kids want to know it all

As parents of four small humans, the Wonder Woman and I handle a staggering amount of questions from our quartet of Sharpnadoes.

If you don’t live with young children on a daily basis, it is hard to imagine the avalanche of inquiries that is the reality of our lives as parents. Indeed, it is even a little difficult to articulate. The best I can do is to tell you to imagine a big book, something like the Bible, War and Peace, or a dictionary. Now imagine that book is full of nothing but questions. Now imagine that that book just lists the questions from Monday. That should give you an idea of what I’m talking about.

These questions can be tough to deal with, but they are also frequently entertaining. Here are some of my favorites from the last week.

“Was that amazing?”

This question isn’t remarkable for its vocabulary, but for the occasion when it was asked. We are in deep attempting to potty train a certain member of the family and she asked this question of me when she went poopy in the potty.

“What is for supper?”

Again we have a seemingly innocuous question that is asked quite often, but the circumstances of the query make all the difference. This was asked by a child, just after sitting down for a meal — lunch. This child hadn’t even eaten lunch and was already asking about supper. This is either the result of a growth spurt or an attempt to push me over the edge. Both options are possible.

“Is that Darth Vader?”

The Sharpnadoes have seen the original three Star Wars films, and are aware of who the characters are, which is why it was a little odd that one of them thought they spotted him in a Chronicles of Narnia movie.

“Can we have dessert?”

This wasn’t a question so much as proof that small, innocent-looking children hunt in packs. All three older kids asked me this question in an attempt to get a different answer. After hearing the word NO three times they started over, and I would still be answering this question if I hadn’t promised to withhold dessert for a next week from the next one to ask.

“What’s your deal dad?”

This is an excellent question, and one for which I frankly don’t have an answer. All I can say is that I used to be normal, then I had children who started asking questions.